Many men like many women realize that as angry as they are, they do still love their partner. You feel deeply connected to her and want to rebuild if she is remorseful.
Or you may want to save the marriage for the sake of the children.
If so, allow yourself to cool off and to approach things with some humility. Expressing the full force of your rage may drive your wife into being defensive and racing to the arms of the man she has had the affair with.
